Saturday, September 12, 2009

the terribles.

i'm going to make a long story short. (something that's not really possible if you are related to my mom!) calvin is in the thick of those terrible two's you always hear about. and, from what i've heard, it doesn't always end when they turn 3 or even 4. so everyday is a new day figuring it all out. i just read this from the parents magazine from september. did it answer all of my questions and solve the problem? not really. but it did make me smile. enjoy all you moms:

39 things every mom should know:

1. you never have to go to obnoxious kid-themed restaurants. ever. i wish someone had told me that.
2. don't make birthday parties a huge deal.
3. do your chores while kids are awake. using up naptime to wash dishes or clean the bathroom is truly soul-crushing.
4. put band-aids on everything your kids want you to. why not?
5.if the kids are awake, bite the bullet and be awake yourself. you'll waste so many hours trying futilely to extend early-morning snoozes that it's not worth it. if you are sick, pregnant, or it's the middle of the night, ignore this advice.
6. just throw away the poopy underwear.
7. don't beat yourself up if you have to use a bribe.
8. teach your kids not to pee outside unless you're camping-you'll be glad you did. but if other people's kids do it, don't judge the parents too harshly-it's all about karma. (if you're in the midst of potty training, all bets are off. you've gotta do what you've gott do.) *whoops. too late for us.
9. buy cheap shoes when kids are litle. feet grow faster than you think.
10. don't forget about board games. you'll suffer through way too much candy land and chutes and ladders, but connect four and battleship aren't half bad. and clue rocks.
11. embrace their quirks.
12. know this: that stain won't come out. and it's okay. (the sooner you accept this, the better)
13. at some point it will be february. things will seem bleak. you will think about vitamins, glasses, more exercise, more sleep, more chores, less tv, more rules, fewer rules, and organic food. just wait. things will get better when the snow melts. know that it will happen again at the end of summer, right before school starts. it's the circle of life, baby.
14. always get boys' haircuts at barber shops instead of hair salons.
15. answer this question: what is the worst thing that can happen if your kids sleep in their clothes?
16. never stifle a generous inclination.
17. try to like what they like. it kinda sucks when it's bob the builder, but the payoff will come when they discover lemony snicket.
18. teach them to pump on the swings asap.
19. if your child falls asleep occasionally without brushing her teeth, don't wake her; baby teeth do eventually fall out. **this is in no way endorsed by dr. travis, hehe.
20. i know you are supposed to use natural consequences to punish bad behavior, but sometimes it's hard to think of natural consequences. in these cases try threatening your kids with clipping their toenails or some other activity they dread. i've had great success with this one, but you must find your own.
21. get used to the word zerrissenheit. it means a state of disjointedness, and it's the new normal for most of us. at least you can feel fancy because it's german.
22. buy kids deodorant before they need it.
23. teach your children to make their own breakfast-and allow enough time so they can do it without pressure
24. i can't stress this enough: use duvet covers on your comforters and forget about a top sheet. not only will you thank me for this advice, but your kids will thank me as well when they are learning to make their bed.
25. remember clogging lessons are not in the best interest of the child.
26. don't administer a punishment that hurts you more than it does them.
27. always pack wipes. if your kids go somewhere without you, send along wipes. it's like having a mom with them.
28. do not allow the word wienies in your home.
29. dress your little girls like, well, little girls.
30. make sure your kids know how they like their eggs and burgers cooked. you don't want them to feel stress when ordering at the diner.
31. it's fine to brag about yourself to your kids. *i absolutely agree.
32. buy quaint wooden toys and hand-knit stuffed animals, but don't expect your kids to play with them.
33. just say "no" to any toy or doll that comes with packets that have to be mixed with water.
34. teach them to like cool music. why suffer through the wiggles when you could be enjoying wilco or counting along with feist?
35. don't buy the most expensive school-picture package. it's a waste of money.
36. give out awards for actual achievements.
37. you're never too old to dress up and decorate for halloween. and it's more fun for everyone if you are into it. it also entitles you to more candy.
38. if the school year, new babysitter, or karate class gets off to a rocky start, don't totally stress out about it. instead, think of the improvement that can be made by the end of the year.
39. independence is a wonderful thing. for everyone. so is together time. make sure you have a healthy dose of both.

(from parents magazine, sept. 2009, page 64)

happy saturday. go cougars!

13 comments:

Jill said...

That was pretty funny. It's amazing how many things you learn from just diving into parenthood and that list shared a lot of them.

Marianne said...

I love it and I don't even have kids yet! It's definitely good to know these things up front...that is if I remember! This preggo brain isn't remembering much these days!

Amber said...

Love the list--thanks for sharing.

kristen said...

k so you know i totally read that article (because i'm cool like you and get that magazine) and thought, "that would be a good blog post." good thing we are friends. come home.

kristen said...

AND... we drove past your apartments the other day to see if sophie would recognize them. NOTHING. then i asked her if she remembered liz and calvin and she just made a weird face. how do little people forget so much when they've only lived for two years? i'd remember everything!

Andrews Family said...

Thanks for that post..I totally needed that! My kids are both in that "Two's" stage and I let it get me all wound up when I should just take this advice. I'm excited to read it again and again! Thanks!

amy stansel said...

This makes me want to write my own list. By the way....I do throw away poopy underwear. I think it's sick to wash out. I tell Ethan once his cool underwear is gone (because i throw it away if he poops in it) than he'll have to wear white underwear - gasp - not that uncool white underwear!!

Jennie said...

I loved that. Also, can I just say you look stunning in the family pics! Yowza. Miss you guys!

The Phipps: said...

loved it. all of it. and you are so beautiful in those family pics. way to go.

The Phipps: said...

loved it. all of it. and you are so beautiful in those family pics. way to go.

Becca Openshaw said...

first off, we miss you... secondly i swear my mom secretly wrote that! hahaha!

Marianne said...

P.S.-there is a guy in my ward that knows you and Alisa from KS. His name is Chris Challis and he was from some city that started with an "A" I think. I'm sure that helps. But anyway, small mormon world!

Natalie said...

What a list! Now if I could only do ALL of those! hahaha Parenting is easy, right?! :)
Your boys are super cute!